What to say when a Tinder match says she has a dog sitter and can't meet this weekend

When someone says the dog sitter fell through, the most likely thing going on is that she has a dog, the sitter was the plan, and now she's stuck. She's probably annoyed at the sitter and a little embarrassed to cancel on you. That's the whole message. She is not telling you she has lost interest, unless her next few messages are short and cold. Read her tone, not the excuse. If she's warm, asks about your week, and apologises with a joke, the match is fine. If she sends one line and nothing else, she may be using the sitter as a polite exit, and you'll find that out in the next exchange rather than by guessing now.

The other thing the message tells you is that she is still thinking about meeting, since she bothered to explain. People who want out usually just stop replying. A cancellation with a reason, and an offer or hint of rescheduling, is a yes that happens to be a no this weekend.

The kinds of reply that fit here are short. One is the acceptance with a light line about the dog, which shows you heard her and didn't take it personally. Its job is to tell her the cancellation is fine. A draft is that kind when it mentions the dog or the sitter in a sentence and stops there. It should leave out any new date, any question about her schedule, and any suggestion that she owes you something.

The second kind is the acceptance with a soft forward hook. It says you'd like to see her when things settle, and it leaves the choice of time to her. A draft is that kind when it refers to a later week without naming a day. It should leave out a specific plan, since she can't commit to one right now.

The third kind is a question about the dog or her week, which keeps the chat going without asking her to do anything. Its job is to give her something easy to answer. It should not turn into a second round of rescheduling.

Reply the same day or the next morning, not at 2am and not three days later. Quick enough that she knows you're not bothered, slow enough that you're not waiting by the phone. If she mentions a specific later day, that's your opening, and you can reply to that. If she only says rain check with no detail, don't chase for a time. Send one more light message in a few days about something she said, like the dog or a plan she mentioned, with no date attached. Then leave it.

If she doesn't answer after two of your messages, stop. Silence after a cancellation is an answer. Don't send a third message asking whether she's still interested, because that puts her in the position of having to decline you. The match has ended, and the next time you talk to her will be because she started it.