Instagram first message for aerial silks performers who share routines
How to message a girl on Instagram who does aerial silks. Stand out by showing you understand the skill, not just the aesthetics.
She's posting aerial silks content because she's invested in the skill, the progress, or the community around it. Her feed isn't random inspiration quotes. It's documentation of something she actually does. That matters.
When you message her, you're competing with people who say "wow, so talented" or "that's insane" or ask her out in three texts. Those openers die because they don't show you've looked at what she's actually sharing.
A good opener here does two things: it shows you understand the specific thing she's doing (not just that it looks cool), and it opens a real conversation about it. You're not asking her out yet. You're starting a thread that could lead somewhere.
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She's documenting a skill, not just sharing a body
The posts matter because she's choosing to show the work, the progression, maybe the failures. If her captions mention something specific (a move she's struggling with, a performance coming up, how long she's been training), she's actually inviting people to see her as someone who does this thing, not someone who looks good doing it.
Read the captions first. Look at the sequence of posts. Is she building toward something? Has she been working on one particular move across multiple videos? Is she training consistently? The more specific you can be about what you've noticed in her content, the more you separate yourself from the noise.
Reference the specific work before mentioning interest in her
Your opener should land one concrete observation about something she posted. Not "your videos are amazing" but something like "noticed you're trying that inversion" or "how long have you been working on that transition." Use a present tense reference to actual content she made.
Then ask something that lets her talk about it. Don't steer toward dating yet. Let the silks conversation be the conversation. If she engages there, you have momentum and a real thread to continue on. The dating part comes later when you've actually connected over something.
Send it while she's active, wait at least four days
Send during her active times (when she's usually posting or engaging). Don't message her right after she posts because you'll look like you were watching. Wait an hour or two.
If she doesn't reply after four days, don't send a follow-up about the silks. The silence means she's not interested. Don't double-text after a week. If she replies once with a short answer and nothing else, that's a soft no. Move on. If she actually engages with the topic, reply the next day at the latest.
Why these openers fail
“wow you're so talented, would love to see you perform sometime”
It's generic praise with no detail, and you jumped to asking for something (a performance) instead of starting a conversation
“that aerial silks thing looks so hard, I could never do it. teach me?”
You're centering yourself and asking her to give you lessons before you've even had a real conversation
“aerial silks is so cool. anyway, do you have a type? lol”
You mentioned her skill once as a throwaway, then immediately pivoted to a dating question, which kills any chance of a real connection
Common mistakes
- Generic compliment ("so talented" or "amazing") with no detail about what you saw
- Asking her to teach you or asking her if she gives lessons in the first message
- Mentioning aerial silks only once then pivoting to a normal dating question
- Using words like "goddess" or "acrobatic queen" instead of talking like a normal person
- Waiting until the second or third message to mention the silks at all
Questions people ask
- Should I ask her about the specific move she's working on if I don't know anything about aerial silks?
- Yes. Say something like "that inversion you've been posting about, how long did it take to get comfortable with it?" You don't need to know silks terminology. Asking about the learning curve or her timeline shows interest in her actual process, not just the finished video.
- What if her posts don't have captions or details about what she's doing?
- Reference the visual. "noticed the new sequence in your last few posts" or "that setup looks different from the one you were using last month." Even if you're not sure what you're looking at, showing you've watched more than one post proves you actually looked.
- How many messages before I can ask her out?
- Wait until she's actually responding and matching the conversation length. If she's giving one-word answers to aerial silks questions, she's not interested. If she's writing longer replies about her training or asks you questions back, you can suggest grabbing coffee in message three or four, not before.
- What if she says she's too busy training to date?
- That's a real answer. Don't try to convince her otherwise. Say something like "makes sense, always cool to see someone committed to something" and leave it. She knows where to find you if that changes.
What people say after using WingAI
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