How to ask her if she's dating other people

If she avoids the question, gives a vague answer, or turns it around on you without answering, that's your signal. It doesn't mean she's definitely seeing someone else. It means she's not ready or willing to be straight with you about it. That matters.

Someone who wants the same thing you do will answer. They might say yes, they might say no, but they'll say something that lands. If she jokes around it, changes the subject, or says "why, are you?" without actually answering your question, she's telling you something. Sit with that for a bit before you push harder.

Your reply does two things. First, it states where you are (you're catching feelings, you're getting more interested, whatever is true). This isn't a threat. It's context. Second, it asks a direct question that can be answered yes or no. Not "I hope you're not seeing anyone else" or "tell me if you are." Actually ask.

Then stop. Don't add reasons why she should say no. Don't soften it with "but no pressure." Don't list what you're offering in return. You're asking for information, not negotiating. Her answer will tell you everything.

Send the message when you're both likely to be awake and have time to think. Not during her work day. Not at 11pm. Afternoon or early evening gives her room to sit with it.

Wait at least three days before you follow up. If she hasn't answered in a week, that's your answer. At that point, you can either ask once more ("Hey, I'm still curious what you think about that") or you can decide that the lack of response is enough information. Don't keep checking in. One follow-up, then you decide what you're doing.