How to reply when he says he's not good at texting
He says he's bad at texting but really likes you. Here's how to respond in a way that moves things forward without letting excuses become a pattern.
When a guy tells you he's not good at texting, he's signaling something on two levels at once. He likes you enough to say it out loud. But he's also setting an expectation that you shouldn't read into slow replies or long gaps. This is your moment to acknowledge what he's said without letting it become a free pass to disappear.
A good reply does two jobs. It shows you heard him and accept how he communicates. It also keeps the door open for him to actually step up and meet you halfway. You're not punishing him for being bad at texting, but you're also not saying it's fine to vanish for three days and then act surprised you moved on.
The best replies are light and forward-looking. They don't dwell on his texting habits or make him defensive. Instead, they signal that you want action. If he really likes you, he'll make the effort.
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Try for freeMost guys mean they prefer other forms of contact
Most guys who say this aren't being literal. They might text slowly because they're busy or distracted. They might forget to reply and feel awkward about the gap. Or they might just dislike text-based conversation and prefer voice or in-person. Rarely does it mean they're incapable of typing words.
The real signal is that he's trying to set boundaries around your expectations before you get frustrated. That's actually not a bad sign. It shows self-awareness. The risk is that he uses it as a blanket excuse to ignore you whenever he wants. Your reply should make clear you accept the boundary, not the blank check.
Acknowledge briefly, then suggest meeting in person
First, acknowledge what he said without over-validating it. A simple nod tells him you heard it and aren't going to spiral over every delayed message. Don't spend a paragraph reassuring him or sharing your own texting insecurities. Keep it brief.
Second, redirect toward real interaction. The goal is to get him off text if that's not his medium. Suggest a call, a date, or something concrete. This does two things at once. It respects his preference and it tests whether he actually likes you enough to show up in a faster, richer way. If he's into you, he'll take the offer.
Reply within hours and wait two days for his response
Reply within a few hours while the conversation is still warm. Don't wait a day to make a point. Speed here just means you're engaged, not desperate.
After you send your reply, give him 24 to 48 hours to respond. If he comes back with energy and a concrete plan, that's good. He's not just saying he likes you, he's showing it. If the conversation dies or he sends something vague, that's information too. A guy who really likes you finds a way to follow through, even if texting isn't his thing. At that point, pull back. Stop chasing the conversation. If he reaches out again, you can give him another chance. But don't be the one carrying it.
Why these replies fail
“Haha that's okay, I don't mind at all! I'm not great at texting either so this works out perfectly”
You're now both giving each other permission to disappear, which defeats the purpose of texting at all.
“That's cool, but I need someone who can actually communicate with me. Just being honest”
You're calling his bluff too hard and turning his comment into a rejection, which closes the door before anything starts.
“I totally get it. My ex was the same way. Anyway, what are you up to this weekend?”
You're ignoring what he said and jumping to logistics, which makes it seem like you didn't actually hear or believe him.
Common mistakes
- Reassuring him too hard ('It's totally fine, take your time') signals you'll accept no effort.
- Calling out the excuse immediately ('So you mean you won't reply to me?') makes him defensive.
- Ignoring what he said and moving on makes it look like you didn't believe him.
- Over-explaining your own texting style turns it into a negotiation about communication.
- Sending a long, detailed reply to his short message rewards his low effort.
Questions people ask
- Should I believe him when he says he's not good at texting?
- Probably, to a point. Treat it as true unless his actions prove otherwise. Give him room to be bad at texting in the early stage. But watch what he does instead. Does he call? Suggest dates? Engage when you two are talking? Those actions tell you more than his texting speed.
- How do I reply without sounding like I'm accepting excuses?
- Keep it short and move forward. Don't dwell on the texting comment or try to fix it. Acknowledge it lightly and suggest a faster way to connect. This shows you take him seriously without letting him off the hook entirely.
- What if he continues to text slowly even after this?
- Accept that this is how he operates and decide if you can live with it. Some guys are really this way. If it bothers you after a few weeks, that's real incompatibility. Stop investing time trying to get him to text faster. Either accept his pace or move on.
- Is there a risk he'll use this as an excuse to ghost me later?
- Yes. That's why your reply needs to open a door to a faster form of connection, not just accept texting as your only channel. If he really likes you, he'll use phone calls, dates, or other ways to show up. If he disappears and blames texting, you'll already know what kind of person he is.
What people say after using WingAI
“I was skeptical at first. Then I tried it on a dry chat and the replies actually sounded like me, not a chatbot.”
Mazoonx
“She went cold mid-week and I had no idea what to say. The reply I sent felt natural and she picked the chat back up.”
Marcus T.
“I overthink every text. Having three options and picking the one that sounds like me cut that spiral short.”
Sam R.
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