Ask her for a video call before meeting in person

By the time you want to video call, she has spent real time texting you but has no way to know if you look like your photos, sound like you do in your head, or have any chemistry in real time. She's likely wondering if you're worth the energy of getting ready and showing up. She may also worry that a video call is a step toward commitment when she's still figuring out if she wants to meet at all.

Her hesitation is not about you personally. It's about the gap between text and reality. If your messages have been one-liners or generic, she has less reason to believe a video call will be worth her time. If you've actually had a conversation, she's more likely to see it as the natural next step rather than an odd ask.

First, it needs to feel like your idea, not hers. You're suggesting something specific because you want to know her better before you meet, not because the app told you to or because you're nervous. Name a format she can picture. 'Video chat' is clear. 'A quick call' signals you respect her time. Vague things like 'connect' or 'see each other's faces' make it sound like you haven't thought it through.

Second, give her a real reason that isn't about filtering her out or testing her. Frame it around what you want. You'd rather know if there's something there before making plans, or you want to actually talk instead of trading messages forever. A reason that starts with you, not with her proving something, is much easier to say yes to.

Wait until you've had at least three or four substantial exchanges. This shows she's interested enough to keep talking. Send your message mid-week, not Friday night. Weekends feel urgent. Mention a specific window like 'this week' or 'Sunday afternoon' so she knows you're not asking for tonight.

If she doesn't reply within 24 to 36 hours, she may have gotten busy or lost interest. Send one follow-up message at the 48 hour mark, but keep it short and don't restate the whole thing. If there's still no answer after that, move on. If she declines, accept it without pushing back. Some people just prefer to meet in person first, and that's a valid preference. Don't ask again after she's said no.